Maurice Bendrix: I’m jealous of this stocking.
Sarah Miles: Why?
Maurice Bendrix: Because it does what I can’t. Kisses your whole leg. And I’m jealous of this button.
Sarah Miles: Poor, innocent button.
Maurice Bendrix: It’s not innocent at all. It’s with you all day. I’m not.
Sarah Miles: I suppose you’re jealous of my shoes?
Maurice Bendrix: Yes.
Sarah Miles: Why?
Maurice Bendrix: Because they’ll take you away from me.
Alvin Straight: You don’t think about getting old when you’re young. . .you shouldn’t.
Cyclist #1: Must be something good about gettin’ old?
Alvin Straight: Well I can’t imagine anything good about being blind and lame at the same time but, still at my age I’ve seen about all that life has to dish out. I know to separate the wheat from the chaff, and let the small stuff fall away.
Cyclist #2: That’s cool man. So, uh, what’s the worst part about being old, Alvin?
Alvin Straight: Well, the worst part of being old is rememberin’ when you was young.
Spike: Hey, you couldn’t help me with an incredibly important decision, could you?
William: This is important in comparison to, let’s say, whether they should cancel third world debt?
Spike: That’s right. . .I’m at last going out on a date with the great Janine and I just want to be sure I’ve picked the right t-shirt.
William: What are the choices?
Spike: Well. . .wait for it. . .first there’s this one. . .Cool, huh?
William: Yes. . .might make it hard to strike a really romantic note.
Spike: Point taken. Don’t despair! If it’s romance we’re looking for, I believe I have just the thing!
William: Well, there again, she might not think you have true love on your mind.
Spike: Right. Just one more. [beat] True love, here I come!
William: Well, yeah, that’s, that’s perfect.
Spike: Thanks. Great. Wish me luck.
William: Good luck.
Alice Harford: Millions of years of evolution, right? Right? Men have to stick it in every place they can, but for women. . .women it’s just about security and commitment and whatever the fuck else!
Dr. Bill Harford: A little oversimplified, Alice, but yes, something like that.
Alice Harford: If you men only knew. . .
Phil Parma: I know this sounds silly and I know that I might sound ridiculous. Like this is the scene in the movie where the guy’s trying to get ahold of the long lost son, you know, but this is that scene. This is that scene. And I think that they have those scenes in movies because they’re true, you know, because they really happen. And you gotta believe me. This is really happening. I mean, I can give you my number and you can go check with whoever you have to go check with and call me back, but do not leave me hanging on this. Alright? Please? See, this is the scene in the movie where you help me out.
Dean McCoppin: Get back! I said get back! I mean it!
The Iron Giant: No. Stop. Wait.
Hogarth Hughes: It was an accident. He’s our friend.
Dean McCoppin: He’s a piece of hardware, Hogarth. Why do you think the army was here? He’s a weapon, a big. . .big gun that walks.
The Iron Giant: I. . .I. . .I not gun.
Dean McCoppin: Yeah? Then what’s that? [points at huge hole the Giant's ray left on a bus] You almost did that to Hogarth!
The Iron Giant: No! [Runs away]
Hogarth Hughes: Come back! [Runs after the Giant]
Dean McCoppin: Hogarth! Hey stop!
Hogarth Hughes: Giant! Come back!
Dean McCoppin: [sees the toy gun Hogarth left on the ground] It was defensive. He reacted to the gun.
Handsome Internet Expert: Now maybe when this thing has finished its searching, we could go to this, uh, this neat little bar I know and, uh, have a little drink. What do you say?
Elizabeth ‘Libby’ Parsons: Yeah. I just have to check in with my parole officer first.
Handsome Internet Expert: You’ve been to jail?
Elizabeth ‘Libby’ Parsons: Actually prison. Jail is a different thing.
Handsome Internet Expert: [laughs nervously] So what did you do? Not pay your parking tickets?
Elizabeth ‘Libby’ Parsons: Oh, no. I was convicted of murdering my husband.
Handsome Internet Expert: You’re kidding, right?
Elizabeth ‘Libby’ Parsons: No, I’m not. “Sliced and Diced” the paper called it. Can you believe that?