Kit: I need to buy a gun. How much is this big gun here?
Jim: That’s a 12 gauge shotgun. That’s a pretty powerful weapon. You know for a woman your size I’d recommend, you know, a little something more compact.
Kit: So I just point and then I squeeze the trigger and then BOOM!?
Jim: Yeah. Uh, what did you say you were shooting?
Kit: Twelve-hundred bucks? Wow. How much are the bullets for this?
Jim: [laughs] Shells. Shotguns use shells. Anyway, whatever, they’re 15 bucks for a box of 25.
Kit: Ok. Um, I don’t need a whole box. I just need…hmm…one.
Jim: You know, I get sad sometimes too. So many pressures in life, you know? Can I give you a phone number for some people who can help…
Kit: Ohhhh noooo.
Jim: It’s like a hotline…
Kit: Uhhh listen sunshine, I’m not suicidal…
Jim: No I know…
Kit: I just have a problem with a mockingbird.
Jim: Ok. You can’t kill a mockingbird!
Kit: Why not?!
Jim: Well for one, there’s the book To Kill A Mockingbird.
Kit: Oh! A copy of that too! Right here.
Jim: No, it’s not a manual [laughs] on how to kill a mockingbird! It’s a classic American novel! How do you not know this?
Kit: I know a lot of other things! Give me this gun!
Jim: No!
Kit: Yes!
Jim: I’m not going to sell you this gun! Mockingbirds are protected under the federal migratory birds treaty and killing one is a crime!
Kit: Look, this is insane! I have rights too you know! And maybe you haven’t heard of the 6th amendment!
Jim: The right to a speedy and public trial?
Kit: You! You’re on my list…Jim!