Charlotte Dalrymple: Dr. Granville, I can assure you that women enjoy physical pleasure just as much as men, even if it can be hard to come by.
Dr. Mortimer Granville: Physical pleasure has nothing to do with it. It is strictly a medical treatment that stimulates the nervous system.
Charlotte Dalrymple: Indeed it does, doesn’t it. Bargain it to guinea. But my point is, according to your diagnosis, hysteria seems to cover everything, from insomnia to toothache.
Dr. Mortimer Granville: It’s not my…
Charlotte Dalrymple: It’s nothing more than a catch-all for dissatisfied women. Women, forced to spend their lives on domestic chores and their prudish and selfish husbands who are unwilling or unable to make love to them properly, or often enough.
Dr. Mortimer Granville: You seem to have strong opinions on husbands for a woman who doesn’t have one.
Charlotte Dalrymple: Look, if you don’t believe me, ask your patients.
Dr. Mortimer Granville: Faintly ironic, don’t you think. Use my engagement party as an opportunity to deliver your opinion these matters?
Charlotte Dalrymple: Yes, yes. And I apologize for that, but you must admit, you men really did get the best side of the bargain.
Dr. Mortimer Granville: Bargain?
Charlotte Dalrymple: For us, it’s mindless housework and doting on some mindless halfwit–
Dr. Mortimer Granville: You can make some mindless halfwit very happy.
Charlotte Dalrymple: It is simply not enough for me, or for most women. Would it be enough for you?
Dr. Mortimer Granville: Oh, I’m not most women. Wouldn’t you be lonely?
Charlotte Dalrymple: I will take a partner. An equal. But, not for me, a life of darning socks, doing chores until my mental faculties become Sunday pudding.