Hammer: May I help you sir?
Rib Joint Customer: How much for an order of ribs?
Rib Joint Customer: $2.50? How many ribs do I get with that?
Hammer: Ahhh, about five
Rib Joint Customer: Five! [does math on his hand] So I guess that’s about fifty cents a rib, huh?
Hammer: Yeah, about.
Rib Joint Customer: K, lemme get one.
Hammer: Right on. [yells to the cook] One order!
Slammer: One order of ribs.
Rib Joint Customer: No, no. . .no, no. . .one rib.
Hammer: One. Rib.
Rib Joint Customer: I sure am hungry.
Hammer: Uhhhh, make that. . .one. . .rib. To go.
Slammer: One rib?
Hammer: One rib. . . What else?
Rib Joint Customer: You got any soda?
Hammer: One… dollar.
Rib Joint Customer: Aww, come’on now. . .look out for a brotha. . .man. . .come’on. . .Hey check this out, why don’t you let me get a sip for fifteen cents?
Hammer: My cups cost more than fifteen cents!
Rib Joint Customer: Alright, fuck the cup, pour it in my hands for a dime.
Hammer: Look you greasy hair Jheri curl wearin. . .pay me & get the hell out of my store!
Rib Joint Customer: [Takes out change, counts it, then pulls out a huge wad of bills] You got change for a hundred?
Hammer: Look, we’re gonna need orthopedic surgeon to remove my foot from your ass!
Park: I saw you walking. May I drop you somewhere?
France: No thanks. I’m strolling.
Park:This is Africa! It’s too hot to stroll.
Izzy: Thanks so much for coming tonight. I felt so clumsy the other day.
Sam: It was an awkward situation, Mrs. Mandelbaum setting it up like that. I should have spoken to you on my own the first time I saw you.
Izzy: When was that?
Sam: The first time? About three and a half years ago, I think.
Sam: In the neighborhood. On the benches with your bubbie. Around.
Sam: Then one day, Mrs. Mandelbaum comes by the store does her usual spiel. Shows me her pictures, tells her lies. “This one’s 18, a scholar. This one’s 22, a beauty.” Some of these pictures were taken before the flashbulb was invented. But it’s like this little ritual we have. She has a business and I respect that. I’m a bachelor. She can’t help herself.
Izzy: Wait a minute. You mean, you didn’t hire her?
Sam: No. But on this particular day she pulled this from her bag.
Izzy: Oh, no.
Sam: And I said, “Yes, Mrs. Mandelbaum this one I’ll meet.”
John The Baptist: Love. What does it mean? Love is sweet as honey, but it’s also blood. Love is action. You want a new crop, you burn the earth.
Jesus: But isn’t love enough?
John The Baptist: No, no! Look at the world around you! Plague, war, corruption, false prophets, false idols, worship of gold! Nothing is of value. The tree is rotten. You have to take the ax and cut it down.
Jesus: If I was a woodcutter, I’d cut. If I was a fire, I’d burn. But I’m a heart and I love. That’s all I can do.
Mrs. Pell: It’s ugly. This whole thing is so ugly. Have you any idea what it’s like to live with all this? People look at us and only see bigots and racists. Hatred isn’t something you’re born with. It gets taught. At school, they said segregation what’s said in the Bible. . .Genesis 9, Verse 27. At 7 years of age, you get told it enough times, you believe it. You believe the hatred. You live it. . .you breathe it. You marry it.
Julian: Call it something catchy. The Reluctant Tourist. And you are the fella to write it.
Macon: But I hate to travel.
Julian: I thought so, but so do businessmen. They would rather be at home in their living rooms. So you will be helping them
to pretend that that’s where they are. What do you think? Your logo. You get it? While armchair travelers
dream of going places…traveling armchairs dream of staying put.